Wednesday, July 20, 2011

The Doctor has Left the House

Well not really, he mere left the field much earlier than he normally does when he toes the rubber.  I sat there stunned and I had the worse feeling in my gut when he called Chooch out to the mound in the fifth inning of his last start. I knew something was wrong. I can’t say Doc never shows emotion on the mound. Time and time again, I’ve seen him stab his glove in disgust at the return throw from Ruiz when he felt he was slighted on a strike that was called a ball. But that is usually the extent of his emotions on the hill. Doc looked worried like something was REALLY wrong. I was worried he felt a strain or worse heard something pop. Ninety-five percent of the time he goes about his business “like a robot” a description that is about as overused as Mick Billmeyer’s beer cozy, but true nonetheless. In fact, as the famous Phillies Bunts’ commenter, House of Funkhausers stated the Cubs announce team had stated something to the effect that “the thermostat of the robot was broken.”

Those who live and die with the Phillies know Doc is a relentless pitching machine who while not vocal leads by example showing up to the training complex at five in the morning to get his workout started. I’m not going to lie. Halladay has been my favorite pitcher since way before he donned a Phillies cap and pinstripes so maybe I’m taking this too personal but I can’t believe what people have been saying about Halladay leaving the game. In fact this is how Wikipedia has been updated:

On April 24, 2011, Halladay struck out 14 and allowed just 5 hits in the game as his team swept the San Diego Padres in all four games. Halladay took a two-hitter into the ninth before allowing three straight singles. He allowed just one run and won, 3–1.
In May, Halladay was named the 2011 winner of the John Wanamaker Athletic Award, by the Philadelphia Sports Congress, based on his 2010 season.
On July 18th, Roy Halladay was clinically diagnosed with pussidis, after leaving his start against the Cubs due to the heat.

For those who don’t know, pussidis is “a chronic condition in which a man's behavior     makes it seem as if he has a pussy between his legs.” I know anyone can update a Wiki page, so maybe it’s just a Phillies hater. But explain so called Phillies fans comments on Facebook and message boards. If 2 Cy Youngs aperfect game, a playoff no hitter and a tireless work ethic hasn’t garnered enough respect to trust Halladay knows his own body and when something is wrong than nothing will ever be good enough.

Earlier this week, Eugene wrote a great piece on how Philadelphia is no longer an Eagles town but a Phillies town, while I completely agree; a large majority of Phillies fans still have a football mentality. That every game is do or die and it’s just not the case. I don’t want to see Roy Halladay out on the mound dizzy and blurred vision and take a liner off the noggin and miss months or the rest of the season because I need to talk about a Phillies win tomorrow. I’d rather talk about a World Series Championship 20 years from know.

The Phillies have great jerseys. In fact I’ll forgo the suit; I’d like to be buried in one. The problem with a Phillies jersey is the sleeves cover up a lot of Eagles tattoos.

Stay hydrated and I’ll see ya at the ballpark!

Jay Wrizight


  1. As a medical professional, the correct term is pussyitis. The suffix itis means inflammation of, as in appendecitis: inflammation of the appendix or hepatitis: inflammation of the liver.

    Today's medical lesson was brought to you by Viagra, which causes dickitis.

  2. Either way Halladay will be remembered for his accomplishments. Also, glad he is "MAN" enough to admit he needed to come out!

  3. Katie, thanks for the clarification. The Wriz doesn't use foul language like that so I didn't know any better.

  4. Well said Wriz. Anyone who has a problem with Halladay can kiss my pale, Irish ass! If I hear that bulls!t at CBP I'm gonna throw down. I hope you have my back.