Tuesday, June 7, 2011

“AT LEAST OUR BALLS DON’T GO INTO THE DELAWARE RIVER”

Happy Tuesday Bunters!

By now I am sure that the thousands of you that trekked across the Keystone State for this past weekend’s series in Pittsburgh have made it safely back to the City of Brotherly Love (or somewhere in New Jersey, wherever you may dwell). I wish I could have hopped the bus back with you but eh, what can I do. Wherever Pittsburgh may be lacking in the ‘cosmopolitan’ department (hey – I’m a quasi world traveler I can say that!) they definitely make up for it when heading down to PNC Park for a few games. Sadly, most of the people of Pittsburgh wouldn’t know crap about the little gem on the North Shore as they are a bunch of tool bag, fair weather fans. The park is gorgeous, the walk across the Clemente Bridge is cool and the pregame festivities and block party-like atmosphere is something the Phillies organization should take note of. But the fans? I’ll get into the shiteous Pirates fans issue in a bit. Let’s talk Phillies, shall we?!

Like me, I’m sure many of you left Pittsburgh sun burnt, head-scratching and dumbfounded. How on EARTH did the Phillies drop 2 games to the Bucco’s? I don’t think it takes a genius to disseminate the Phillies loses over the latter part of May/early June with the Mutts, Nats and now Pirates. NO. OFFENSE. As Hamels opened the series against Pittsburgh Friday evening, the Phillies had their entire starting lineup ready to play with the return of Victorino for the 1st time in the 2011 season. Yeah. That could only mean one thing, right??!! A WIN! RUNS! DID YOU PACK THE BROOMS?! Woot woot!
Yeah. That’s what I thought. But I was sorely disappointed.

Despite Hamel’s solid performance, the Phils dropped the opener after a 12 inning game 2-1. The lackluster offense was once again silent as CHASE UTLEY provided the single run for the Phillies. You bet your sweet ass I was quite the celebrator that evening in Pittsburgh J

Saturday went as well as I’m sure most of already assumed once we got the news that KK was pitching. I feel bad for the guy; Maybe he has developed such a performance anxiety that he simply can’t produce anymore? Who knows? What I do know is that it is incredibly frustrating to watch…. Not to mention incredibly sad that the newly emerged Pittsburgh Pirates ‘fan base’ LOVED KK. I swear to you I overheard more than once winning against the Phillies would be “better than making the playoffs”. Is that so Mr. Bucco? How would you know? When was the last time you made the f*cking playoffs?? (*side note* Wriz… I know how to spell the F word. I am just a LADY; I try not to curse if I can help it).

Anyway, this brings me back to the tool bag, fair weather fans.

A few weeks back I stated on this very blog that I would happily take on the Pirates as my “away from home” team. Of course it didn’t mean I would really cheer for them; It’s kind of like when the Phils are away and you have a baseball jones and take yourself over to the Camden Riversharks for a fix (ONLY BASEBALL FIXES WHILE IN CAMDEN PEOPLE, control yourselves). Who really followers them? You cheer for them, sure. But who really knows their record, pitching rotations or starting line up? (OK, some of you may be TRUE Riversharks fans but c’mon). Well, I’ll tell you something: The Pirates can kiss my ass because I would NEVER want to be caught up amongst the fan douchery I witnessed this weekend at PNC Park.

Fans of Philadelphia sports teams get a bad rap. I may be biased on that, but I can tell you that on Friday I witnessed some real major fan stupidity from the drunk-o Bucco fans. I was in the Hall of Fame club with some real a-holes. From the moment I made my way to the deck where our seats were I heard these 2 morons do nothing but TRASH Philly. I think the legendary KimberLee touched on this earlier this season: if you are at a baseball game … WATCH the baseball game. Or at the very least talk BASEBALL. I don’t care to hear your thoughts on my “filthy” city (that’s about as lady-like a word I can repeat from them). I don’t care that you are so PROUD your home runs could make it into the ALLEGHENY River and not the disgusting DELAWARE River (YES, this tool bag actually said that. I guess he doesn’t realize that the Delaware isn’t really near CBP). I also really couldn’t care for the threats of kicking my ass by the dude over a foot and a half taller than me or the same threats by his fat chick cousin who was my weight x2 (and tried to convince me she was the mayor of this fine city). I can take some razzing, I swear to you. I am probably one of the biggest sh*t talkers you know. But I do it in FUN. I NEVER threatened someone, let alone someone who didn’t say a damn word to me over 8 innings. Over the 3 day series, it was the only major incident I personally was a part of - yet it left a very bad taste in my mouth.

What I noticed about my time in the ‘Burgh is their hatred of Philadelphia. I mean these people HATE Philadelphia. LOATHE. DETEST. The funny thing is… did we ever think we were rivals with Pittsburgh? I don’t think I ever said ‘Pittsburgh’ in a derogatory way except when the Flyers were up against the Pens. These people celebrated like they won the NL pennant. No, they just got 2 games from us. *SHRUGS*
Thankfully Halladay was on the mound on Sunday and I think the Phillies fans were able to breathe a little easier, despite the soupy conditions at PNC Park. Within the first 3 innings I was burnt to a crisp. I’ve often wondered how those guys can wear those uniforms in 90+ degree weather and insane humidity. I am sure the millions of dollars they make help to make it a little easier.

The bats supported Doc’s efforts that resulted in a sweep avoiding 7-3 win. I never imagined that I would be blogging happily that the Phillies avoided a sweep from the Pittsburgh Pirates. I guess that goes to show what I know.
*House keeping*
J-Roll tweeted that his x rays were negative and would be undergoing an MRI.

What the HELL is up with that friggin’ Parrot???!! That’s REALLLLL Ham and Egg Pittsburgh.

Until next week bitches!!
-xo,
DiamondGirl215
Thoughts? Questions? Email me at DiamondGirl215@philliesbunts.com!

7 comments:

  1. I am more than a little disappointed you didn't throw down.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm sorry to have disappointed you my dear anonymous reader.

    However, I try to stay out of jail.
    Just because I CAN kick ass doesn't mean I SHOULD.

    Ya dig?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Its FUCK! Phillies Bunts is NSFMFW! BTW I too think you shoulda defended Philly's honor by flicking fists.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thank you for the spelling lesson. I dont have a darned clue what NSFMFW means though.

    I don't look good in orange. Sorry. Nor do i in black and blue. I do enough damage to myself simply walking out the door. I dont need anyone else bruising me up.

    How come no one else thinks it SUCKED i went through this? You toads just want to see me fight. Im too old for that crap(however, should a hand been laid upon my precious skin it would have gone down).

    ReplyDelete
  5. And the Phillies fans get the bad wrap. The same fans that take over every stadium the Fightin' Phils play in. Sorry you got messed with DiamondGirl, Phillies Bunts Nation has your back.

    ReplyDelete
  6. HouseOfFunkhausersJune 8, 2011 at 4:16 PM

    Funkhauser got a bad wrap once too dB . From the Pita Pit. Tuna. Uhhh. Put me outta commission for days.

    Pirates "fans" are frauds, as the great Eskin would say

    ReplyDelete