Do you need a Scorecard?

As the Pitchers and Catchers reported to Clearwater, if you hadn’t already noticed, it became blatantly obvious. These aren’t you mother’s WFC Philadelphia Phillies. There’s no cool beards. Not Bruntlett’s nor Werth’s. No Stairs to use in an emergency. The AARP card carriers are gone. Both Moyer and the oldest rookie were no where to be found. Lights out for good this time. Lidge and the whole fucking bridge are but a distant memory. Burrell’s Budweiser parade float took him straight to the airport but now he’s hung up his bat for good. Even his replacement has done his time and moved on.

Even though 2008 is only 3 seasons ago, there’s only 7 holdovers and that’s including Kendrick who wasn’t even on the postseason roster. Maybe you didn’t know the exact number but I’m sure you know the team has basically been overhauled. So why bring it up?  First, to say that it’s a necessary evil to let go certain players no matter how much they were loved or productive to keep the team competitive. And secondly to defend those who “miss” or didn’t want to see certain players leave.

I get it. I feel your pain. When the Phillies shipped out Wilson Valdez for a warm body, he took a bit of my heart with him to Cincinnati. Whether it was when he jumped up from the bench to celebrate a comeback walk off win or shaking off the catcher in the most impressive relief effort of 2011, or when he stepped onto the field with whatever the heck that was on his chin, he was “my boy.” Sure, I know he was a double play waiting to happen. But he also held the team together in 2010 when everyone and their brother were hurt. He played above average defense and put up offensive numbers while modest for most ML players were far beyond his skills. In fact, I gave him the Wriz nod for team MVP.

The fact the Phillies have been a MLB elite team makes these “break ups” even harder. You see, winning is like the great sex of sports. Nobody ever breaks up when the sex is good. Sure you may hate each other, but in the sex is great so you deal even though you know the relationship isn’t going to end in marriage. Luckily, we got RAJ. He makes the tough decisions to keep the team competitive year in and year out. He keeps the team and relationship focused on getting that ring.

Ultimately, my point is its ok to have your favorites but sometimes you need to let go to stay the team to beat, Well that and there’s no winning in the Champagne Room.

See ya at the Ballpark!

Jay Wrizight

jaywrizight@yahoo.com

Holidays (Inn Parking Lot)

Hoodwink’d    by cj hood

Holidays (Inn Parking Lot)

BOBBY IS THE ONLY VALENTINE THIS DUDE’S GETTING!

-if the Mets win the World Series this year Parade Day is on December 21.

-Happy Valentine's Day...what ja get your hand?

-the last Asian NYC was this excited about was selling Coach bags at 75% off. #Lin

-Juan Pierre‘s my 2nd favorite fake French athlete behind Rene Goulet.

-I was more upset when Peter Criss left Kiss than I am over Oswalt’s departure.

-what's long & hard and didn’t get sucked on V*Day?

-RAJ did nothing to improve our starting offense.

-Whitney Houston’s crack pipe

-this is my first blog of the year....the peer pressure got to me.

-Wheels' rug must stink.

-if AJ Burnett becomes a Pirate his nickname will be Long John Headcase.

-I need the Sixers to start losing or I won‘t see the 1st month of the season.

-I miss Valdez already.

-my definition of March Madness is juggling Spring Training, college basketball & St. Patty's drinking.

-re-sign Raul and resign Herndon.

-I'm not bothered by Howard's absence...I'm more excited to see what Mayberry & Thome will do.

-Phils' bench has more new faces than Menudo.

THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL IS GETTING F’ED UP BEYOND BELIEF!

-you see Pence's sister....THUNDER CATS...HHOOOOOOOOOO!

-Hamels is going to show D*Jax how a PRO’s supposed to behave when he wants more money.

-the Nat's are going to wear their Agoraphobiacs throwback uni's during their home stand against the Phils 

-how many wet tshirt contests will T*Mac participate in down at Clearwater?

-I saw Gary Carter play at Shea against the Phils in ‘86. #RIP

-Pat 'the bat' retired.  Now he could spend more time with his first love...your wife!

-@Cholly @ RAJ: What's the plan for changing the offense's approach at the plate?

-in honor of Valentine's Day, the Red Sox held their new skipper up for a keg stand.

-the groundhog saw his shadow...6 more years of Andy Reid

-f' it...I'm getting 'Josh Hamilton drunk' this St. Paddy's Day!

-buying a Pinto off of Larry Dallas is a more attractive deal than purchasing the Dodgers.

-In honor of Black History Month, I’m not going swimming.

-'Bunts Meet & Greet II is going to be the Empire Strikes Back of get-togethers.

-finally gonna meet the Trainrek Krew...maybe there'll be enough of us for a game of horseshoes.

-I don’t know any Arbor Day jokes.

-word is Blanton lost 15 lbs during the off season...I think DB29 found it.

-I’ll be doing standup at Curran’s in NE Philly on March 24th.  Email jimkorhan@yahoo.com for ticket info…let’s get ‘bunted!!!

View from the Left Coast by a Lefty - Only 6 Days...

 Sorry to brag but it’s 82 degrees here right now, all windows are open, and I'm wearing shorts and a t-shirt. If I gave a shit about Seattle I could be out in Peoria watching pitchers and catchers today. So much for that, eh? Six days til Aces and Chooch report, and when they do my FB profile pic will go from my Flyers jersey to my batting pic from high school until the season starts. Had such hopes for the Flyers this year, but Bryz let me and everyone else down. I saw him at his best 2 years ago, dunno what happened. Anyway doesn't matter much anymore, they are the Rangers' bitches and this season is about over.

Wriz and DB hopped on the early train, and it kinda got me going. One week from today when I walk out to my car I will be treated to the POP POP POP of catcher's mitts, unfortunately it’ll be the SF Giants. But then again, none of you will hear that beautiful sound walking out of *YOUR* front doors. :) During this past week, I have had the opportunity to speak to several people in Clearwater for work. Being IT and after fixing their problems I told them I was jealous of them, if only for a month. When I explained about the Phils, two people actually offered to put me up in their houses if I was able to make it out there. One offered to pick up tickets for a game even. I was stunned and speechless that strangers would offer things like that. I guess working for Wells Fargo, with their total team concept, is more than just advertising fodder for billboards. So next time you walk into a Wells Fargo (formerly Wachovia) bank in Philly, it might not hurt to check into their services, especially their mortgages which is my specialty right now.

Gaa I can't believe I said that.  Inside of 2 weeks the whole team will be in FL. Actually, right this minute, best I can figure from news reports is that close to half the active roster of 40 is already in Clearwater. This is not even counting non-roster invitees. My offer to Ryan Howard on my New Years Eve post still stands, to turn him back into the MVP hitter he was in 2006. To Cliff Lee and Hollywood, I offer to teach you the Steve Carlton killer pickoff move that was taught to me back in the late 60's by my high school pitching coach who pitched for the Red Sox. To any and all bunters who may be able to make it out here when the Phillies are in town from 4/23-4/25 let me know and I'll snag tix. Right now I have 4/25 pegged for myself and my 4 kids to go to the daytime getaway game.  But as for spring training I'm off the last week in March, where I'll attend at least one Dbacks game at the newest, most awesome spring training venue in MLB, Salt River Fields at Talking Stick. Just happens to also be less than a mile down the road from Casino Arizona at Talking Stick resort, complete with casino and golf course. Sucks to live in AZ right? Oh yeah, a good friend from TX will be out that week and we'll take in at least one Ranger game (for him).

Some quick last takes.... first I think our bench is mo'betta than at any time last year. Second, I think with all of the arms assembled for spring training our bullpen can't help but be better. Third, Vanimal is entrenched at #4, but is better than a 4. I also truly believe Blanton will come back to be the pitcher he was when we traded for him and that KK is finally due to win at The Bank and not only on the road. Questions? Slams? Fuck yous? There's a place to reply below.  ;)

Let's all get bunted! And will *ANY* of you join me here in April?

                                                Bill S aka/netfather

State of the Bunts Address

Hola! Housekeepin!

While today won’t be a full boar Wriz Wednesday, I just wanted to let everyone know we’ll be back in full force within the next month or so. A couple of times, I sat down to write a piece but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I was going to do a piece on the Winter Classic experience, but when I saw the TBS #postseason advertisement still on the OF wall I felt just as disappointed as I did back in April. Maybe I need to see the boys of summer back in uniform, who knows?

So anyways, we have so great things planned for the upcoming season. Unlike the Phillies, we plan to get better each and every year. We will be having a Phillies Bunts Fantasy Baseball Invitational League. If you’re interested, shoot me an email jaywrizight@yahoo.com plus a few more yet to be announced contests.

CJ Hood will be bringing his stand-up tour to Philadelphia for a rare local appearance. He'll be at Curran’s in NE Philly on March 24^th. Kornhole is producng the gig. The show is a television taping. Advanced tickets are required. Again, just email for more info.

The Bunts are also looking for additional writers in case DB29 decides to branch out and do a blog on the auto industry or trade shows. You know the drill…email.

Lastly, our second annual meet and greet will be on June 3^rd against the Miami Marlins. We have a few game tickets left if you’d like to join us in the game. The tickets are $39 each. We promise to bail you out if things get out of hand like last year, but so we don’t end up on Judge Joe Brown again your bond is a loan not a gift.

Ten days until Aces and Chooch! I feel a little better already!

See ya at Spring Training!

Jay Wrizight

jaywrizight@yahoo.com

Fast Track to Nowhere!

Philadelphia International Autoshow...EPIC FAIL!!!

It's just a few short days till pitchers and Chooch's, Bunters! Pretty soon it will be back to normal, 24/7 Phillies. Diamond Girl will be checking in with her perspective as a Phillies fan who lives in Sh!tsburgh. CJ Hood will be back with his rapid fire comedy stylings. Kornhole will be open for business once again. And our fearless leader, Jay Wrizight will be dropping his considerable baseball knowledge on everyone smart enough to read this blog. All is right with the world. So, before life is right again I would like to rant about a non baseball topic: The Philadelphia International Autoshow.

During the off-season, it's tough to find things to do with the family. I have 2 teenage boys who enjoy going to the Autoshow every year. Even though I'm in the automobile business, (Mt. Ephraim Chrysler Dodge is where I call home, sorry for the shameless plug), I enjoy the Autoshow more than most. Most of my fellow employees would not be caught dead at the Autoshow. They live it everyday, so their time off is time away from cars. My kids and I like to see the new stuff. It is usually a nice day out. Not this year. My first complaint is it cost me $23 to park. I don't mind dropping $20 to park in the Halladay Inn every Sunday to see the Fightin' Phils. It cost $5 more then the Phillies lots but you can tailgate there. Plus, were we park there is tree cover, shade is clutch in July when it's 95 degrees at 10am. And, you have access to a clean bathroom in the lobby. So, $23 just to park in a lot for 2 hours? They also jammed 300 cars in a lot that should only hold 150. Isn't there something the city can do about this?
 

Ok, so we parked, got in the show for free with employee passes, so all is well, right? Wrong, this year all exhibits were consolidated to one floor. In years past they were spread out over 3 levels. Previously you could get close to any car you wanted. You might have to wait a minute to get close to something new or sporty, like a Challenger SRT8 or the Acura NSX. No big deal. This year the line to get close to anything was 5 or 6 deep. Really? I need to wait 15 minutes to get a close look at a Ford Focus? No thanks. I now know what it's like to ride the Tokyo subway.

Whoever came up with the layout must have been drunk, high or both. Classic cars were next to the 'Shamwow!' booth, which was next to the Scion display, and so on.  A total mess. In previous years the main level had all the normal brands, Ford, Toyota, Chevy, Chrysler, etc. High end and Exotics were upstairs. Everything else was downstairs. You could actually walk. This year it was so crowded it was hard to breath. Who is to blame? I have no idea. Is it the City? The Convention Center? Maybe the car manufacturers trying to save some money in a down economy? Who knows? I know it needs to be fixed because right now it is broken.

That is behind us for another year. Let's move on to a more positive topic. Who will be the Chris Coste/Greg Dobbs surprise this Spring Training? Let's Play Ball!

Keep It Classy Philly!

DB29



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