Yard Sale Days Revisited

Hoodwink’d                       by cj hood

Yard Sale Days Revisited

 

 

 

Coming out of the All Star break I commented on Broad Street Misery’s FB page that in order to be legit buyers we need to sweep the Mets and win either the Cards or Tigers’ series.  That did not happen…not even close. What’s worse is the Gnats & Braves aren’t setting the world on fire by any means.  The NL East is weaker than Ryan Braun’s interest in the truth. If we did what we were supposed to do we’d only be a few games out of first right now.  So now what?

 

Every time the Hood Ranch has a yard sale my boys rummage thru the goods, stumble upon their stuff and say “Are you selling this?”  That’s how I feel about the Phillies right now.  Yes we should sell, but the bigger question is ‘what do we sell?’  Another yard sale staple is when these hustlers show up and try to clock a name brand item for fitty-cent.  Which leads me to the next questions my fellow Buntamaniacs: If we do sell how much should we expect back?

 

I posted on the ‘Bunts FB page today that we should re-sign Utley…he’s our best hitter.  Seconds later our favorite heckler, Big Pun, referred to me as a ra-tard.  Thank God someone with a little more panache added that we shouldn’t sign him for more than 2 years.  That’s what I meant yo!  Of course we’re not going to blindly sign LL Cool Chase to a 5 yr/$25mill deal.  If he wants to be a Phil for life then he needs to play ball and so do we.

 

Once again, we are playing as a M*A*S*H unit. Ben Revere’s accident never should have happened, D*Brown who was weak in the 4-hole (told you…lolz) is out til Friday, Howard (who cares) and Doc are all illin.  Moreover, their replacements need to catch the next bus to Lehigh: Mayberry, Ruff and now Martinez (again) aren’t cutting it.  Young & Young Associates defense is mad weak, Rollins is still the King of Pop & Chooch needs to get back on the dope which leads me to my original concept: RE-SIGN UTLEY!

 

I think the turning point for this team was in 2011 when Lee blew the game against the Cards during the pennant race.  The Cards aren’t the same team that won it all that year.  However, their management was slick enough to retool the club with some great talent.  Which leads me to my final thought kids: FIRE RAJ! Before yesterday’s game Amaro told Murphy that we are still buyers, but by the end of the convo he said we might sell.  Whatta ya sell em’, buy em, sell ‘em? He doesn’t know which end is up.  He should have been fired after trading Lee away.  He tried to build a team around our aces by shopping at a yard sale and now we’re looking at Brian Wilson.  I’m sick of seeing these no-name has-beens wear the red pin stripes. 

 

Although the fans yelling ‘SELL! SELL! SELL!’ may be right they need to be more specific…just in case Rubes (or whoever) is listening.  Let’s get ‘Bunted!

Ssshhh…we’re winning

Hoodwink’d                       by cj hood

Ssshhh…we’re winning.

 

 

WATCH THIS WHIFF BRO!

 

So rumblings of the Phils being a ‘selling team’, a lil pow-wow courtesy of Cholly & Rubes and all of sudden we win the series against the Pirates, Braves and (maybe even the) ‘Gnats! Oh snap!  Is this for realz or just fool’s gold?  Time will tell I guess, but as of now we’re winning and all of my ‘Buntamaniacs have their own opinions on what’s behind the surge.  So, what does the H*Double think put the Phight back into our Phightans?  Like my Italian uncle would say….tree tings!

 

3.  Ryan Howard to the DL:  A lot of people only believe in God when bad things happen.  This is similar to the relationship the Phils organization has with the Big Piece.  We have to start him (no el platoono) and bat him clean-up or bad stuff will happen.  Well, the sacred cow is on the DL, so we could all breathe a sigh of relief.  He’s dead weight bro and I guarantee whoever takes his spot in the lineup (Ruff, Mayberry, Frandsen) will not (consistently) strike out as much as Howard did.  Based on the latter alone this team has already improved.  Plus, Downtown Dom Brown now gets to bat clean-up and rightfully so.

 

2.  Ole King Cole:  Cole is on a FI-YUH!  Well sort of, but he has won 2 in a row.  His game against the ‘Gnats was superb which included bailing himself out of some sticky situations.  I guess pushing him back really did work.  Now that our #1 Ace is sorta kinda back we now have that 1-2 (#Lee ) punch we need.  Don’t forget Lannan looked sharp to, so now we just need KK to get his ish together.

 

1.Ben Revere:  He did it like this…he did it like that…he did it with a league issued bat!  Word to my 40oz!  Hitting is contagious, so with Revere being on fire Young, J*Roll and even D*Young are slowly following suit.  And don’t forget about Utley and the aforementioned Brown.  Could the offense be better?  Hells yes!  But posting 5 runs should be enough for our starters to solidify a win!  Anyone still miss Vance Romance?

 

So what do we do at the deadline?  I think we should sign Utley if the price is right.  I think if Rollins gotta deal then Utley definitely needs some consideration.  I know he’s injury prone, but he’s a solid bat and the face of the franchise.  He’s the Derek Jeter of the Phillies…losing him would hurt this team on so many levels. Once that deal’s done get some bullpen help.  If that involves trading M*Young or Chooch then so be it.  I love Chooch, but a juiceless Chooch is like a Playboy without the centerfold.  Once those 2 things are done I think we’ll be alright.  If the offense & Cole continue to produce and with Halladay & *cough* Howard coming back I think we could give the Bravos a run for their money.  And if the total opposite happens then fire RAJ immediately, just don’t blame me cuz I’m only a jackass off the internet.  Follow me on twitter @therealcjhood…let’s get ‘bunted!!!