How Sweep It Is!

Hoodwink’d                       by cj hood

How Sweep It Is!

 

 

 

IT SAYS RIGHT HERE ‘REMOVE ASCHE & REPLACE WITH FRANCO’

 

Oh snap!  Don’t look now, but someone rang the CB Park’s doorbell and left a Swiffer Sweeper

right next to the Mike Schmidt statue.  My goal here is to pen this piece, email it to the Wriz and get it on da blog spot before this glorious win streak ends!  Our legion of Buntamaniacs didn’t think O’Sullivan could deliver a win, but low & behold you ‘doubting Thomaseses’ he did!  A 5 game win streak including a sweep of the D*Backs!  Granted the two Pirate wins were our faux Aces vs their duds and the D*Backs play like d*bags, but irregardless (not a real word) we got it diz-one!!!  Now off to Colorado where the mountains are high and so are their residents.  Will the streak hit 6?  Will there be another sweep?  Or will Ryan ‘Lloyd’ Braun get higher than Snoop Dog at a Denver Pot Café?  Time will tell, but with Galvis’ hot bat and Franco ‘Everything But’ American on our side…the sky is the limit.  (Assuming the sky is like my man cave ceiling #6fttall).  But next week, when T*Mac announces the Phillies Star of the Week, he won’t be doing it with tongue planted firmly in cheek.  This week was real, almost parade worthy.  For a team still sitting in last place we need to appreciate the small stuff, so let’s celebrate good times…come on….

 

YOU KNEW THIS PIC WAS COMING.

-Why do they call Francoeur ‘Frenchy?’

-I hope they gave Cody Asche one of those whiffle ball bats before he left.

-They were about to rename this team Amtrak prior to this win-streak.
-The thrill is forever gone.

-Why did I just here about the Schmitter?

-I went to Weather Day just for Sheena Parveen!

-DB29 is 5 pounds away from never having to tuck a shirt in again.

-Chase is still the man!

-How ‘bout my man Howard!!!

-Remember Wriz Wednesdays. #flashbackmonday

-Did Rioter win the Preakness?

-The Marlins will collapse in T-Minus 3, 2, ……

-The ‘Dad-bod’ is now in! Where was this 20 years ago?

-Congrats Pap!

-Don’t throw the ball to someone unless they’re looking.  #LittleLeague101

-The Kardashians have more ‘Daddy issues’ than the Skywalkers.

-My Phillies Mt. Rushmore:  Schmidt, Carlton, Chase, Pete Rose. #comeatmebro

-Remember Netfather Bill.  #throwbackmonday

-Wonder if the Poop Bandit has a Bunts tshirt?

-My son got up at 6:30am on a Saturday to do homework.  Waiting on paternity test.
-Meet & Greet V is one month away….let’s get ‘Bunted!!!

Do you need a Scorecard?

As the Pitchers and Catchers reported to Clearwater, if you hadn’t already noticed, it became blatantly obvious. These aren’t you mother’s WFC Philadelphia Phillies. There’s no cool beards. Not Bruntlett’s nor Werth’s. No Stairs to use in an emergency. The AARP card carriers are gone. Both Moyer and the oldest rookie were no where to be found. Lights out for good this time. Lidge and the whole fucking bridge are but a distant memory. Burrell’s Budweiser parade float took him straight to the airport but now he’s hung up his bat for good. Even his replacement has done his time and moved on.

Even though 2008 is only 3 seasons ago, there’s only 7 holdovers and that’s including Kendrick who wasn’t even on the postseason roster. Maybe you didn’t know the exact number but I’m sure you know the team has basically been overhauled. So why bring it up?  First, to say that it’s a necessary evil to let go certain players no matter how much they were loved or productive to keep the team competitive. And secondly to defend those who “miss” or didn’t want to see certain players leave.

I get it. I feel your pain. When the Phillies shipped out Wilson Valdez for a warm body, he took a bit of my heart with him to Cincinnati. Whether it was when he jumped up from the bench to celebrate a comeback walk off win or shaking off the catcher in the most impressive relief effort of 2011, or when he stepped onto the field with whatever the heck that was on his chin, he was “my boy.” Sure, I know he was a double play waiting to happen. But he also held the team together in 2010 when everyone and their brother were hurt. He played above average defense and put up offensive numbers while modest for most ML players were far beyond his skills. In fact, I gave him the Wriz nod for team MVP.

The fact the Phillies have been a MLB elite team makes these “break ups” even harder. You see, winning is like the great sex of sports. Nobody ever breaks up when the sex is good. Sure you may hate each other, but in the sex is great so you deal even though you know the relationship isn’t going to end in marriage. Luckily, we got RAJ. He makes the tough decisions to keep the team competitive year in and year out. He keeps the team and relationship focused on getting that ring.

Ultimately, my point is its ok to have your favorites but sometimes you need to let go to stay the team to beat, Well that and there’s no winning in the Champagne Room.

See ya at the Ballpark!

Jay Wrizight

jaywrizight@yahoo.com