Hitless Hit List
DWIGHT SCHRUTE COULD HIT A BEET FARTHER THAN THIS GUY.
-North Korea’s a bigger threat than Doc Halladay.
-If you don’t think Chooch’s absence is affecting this team then you’re hopped up on Adderall bro!
-I was always a Frandsen fan!
-Royal ass kicking!
-Ole King Cole? More like Prince Valium. Amirite?
-I see that Kurt Wilson’s using my ‘BREAKING NEWS’ tagline.
-Dear Ryan Howard: I’m sick of your ish!
-Big ups to Philly’s #1 Sex Panther, John Wilt, for letting me know that Michael Young comes out to the Beastie Boys.
-D*Brown’s not doing enough.
-Cholly pulled Lee? Bobby Heenan managed better.
-“Why would I get the new Facebook phone when my MySpace beeper works just fine?” -Wriz
-Halladay’s not the issue as much as the offense is. Ya gotta produce for all your starters boys.
-hate this hot weather…wish it was still winter.
-Thumbs down to DB29 for forgetting about me on Opening Day. Again.
-In honor of Hugh Hefner’s 87th bday this week, 4 girls have been trying to get him hard since October.
-my wing eating contest was the 2nd biggest sporting event this week behind Wrestlemania 29.
-Lookout for my ‘Forever (Michael) Young’ parody video. I got the original red headed kid too…he’s 31 now.
DA MAN
-shut up Oswalt! No one cares. #realtalk
-RA’s doing Dickey in Toronto.
-Bigger disappointment: Mike Greenberg’s book or Wheels’ book?
-Robin yelled at her daughter for blocking the TV during a game. I immediately called Child Services.
-the Braves are like the Ghetto Boys…CAN’T BE STOPPED!
-Who the f’ is Chris Davis?
-Robinson Cano signed with Jay Z this week while Dan Uggla signed with Snow. #informer
-oh ya, Chase is back!!!
-You see the Bull’s fiancé in that jewelry store commercial…BOOM!
-I heard they’re redoing ‘Chico and the Man’ with Freddie Prinze Jr & Cliff Lee. (google it!)
-Rutgers’ basketball players have seen more ‘balls to the face’ than Bree Olson.
-Where’s Galvis?
-My wife watches the Real Housewives like Luke Skywalker watched Yoda.
-Yu Darvish was TEN MINUTE away from a perfect game.
-Adams did his job.
-3-5 is bullshit!!!
-catch me at the Rockledge Firehall this Saturday doing stand-up…let’s get ‘BUNTED!!!
-RA’s doing Dickey in Toronto.
-Bigger disappointment: Mike Greenberg’s book or Wheels’ book?
-Robin yelled at her daughter for blocking the TV during a game. I immediately called Child Services.
-the Braves are like the Ghetto Boys…CAN’T BE STOPPED!
-Who the f’ is Chris Davis?
-Robinson Cano signed with Jay Z this week while Dan Uggla signed with Snow. #informer
-oh ya, Chase is back!!!
-You see the Bull’s fiancé in that jewelry store commercial…BOOM!
-I heard they’re redoing ‘Chico and the Man’ with Freddie Prinze Jr & Cliff Lee. (google it!)
-Rutgers’ basketball players have seen more ‘balls to the face’ than Bree Olson.
-Where’s Galvis?
-My wife watches the Real Housewives like Luke Skywalker watched Yoda.
-Yu Darvish was TEN MINUTE away from a perfect game.
-Adams did his job.
-3-5 is bullshit!!!
-catch me at the Rockledge Firehall this Saturday doing stand-up…let’s get ‘BUNTED!!!
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