The Night Before Opening Day

NO NEED TO BE SCARED THIS SEASON!

‘Twas the night before Opening Day, when all through the park

Not a creature was stirring, not even a lark;

The bats were all hung by the helmets with care,

In hopes that the Phillies soon would be there;

The fans were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of a parade danced in their heads;

Mom in her Hoskins jersey, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down for a long Spring nap,

When out on the field there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.

Away to Citizen’s Bank I flew like a flash,

Tore up 476 and almost near crashed.

Phillies Bunts staff was blogging cuz yo! that’s our biz

With Joe S. and Hood and CEO Wriz

Joe reporting on Facebook, Wriz is on twitter

We put Phillies Nation right in the toilet

When, my wondering eyes saw the mound and the bases

With our young core, plus some new faces

Gabe Kap’s our new skipper he’s tan and all shredded

And we picked up an ace in one Jake Arrieta

More rapid than the Eagles his courses they came,

And he whistled, and shouted and, called them by name,

“Now, Nola! Now, Eickhoff! Nick Pivetta too!

On Vinnie and Ben to round out the crew

From the dugout! To the top of the wall!

They dashed away! Dashed away! Dashed away all!

As dirt kicked up before the wild hurricanes fly.

Now that Scotty got paid, Quinn’s back at Lehigh

Kruky and T*Mac were calling the game,

‘Boy we miss Harry’; Oh! What a shame,

Franco is back, for now anyway

We open this season away at the Braves

As I drew in my head, and was turning around,

Aaron was set and took to the mound.

He was dressed in a throwback, from his head to his foot,

And the strength of his arm could throw a shot put;

The Mets overrated; the ‘Gnats playoff is slop;

The Marlins are played out like the Braves tomahawk.

Three up and three down as Jorge made calls!

Two strike-outs, a pop-out, and only one ball!

Carlos is here to offer Rhys some protection

Gabe’s got coconut oil to grease his sore shoulder

Neshak re-signed, the bullpen is stacked

Herrera, Altherr and Williams are back!

The rebuild is over, no longer in trouble

The 2^nd Wild Card? We’re right on the bubble

We’re young and we’re talented and don’t forget Bold,

The phuture is now cuz we’re no longer old

Hungry dogs run faster just ask Jason Kelce

We will be ready once our pitchers get healthy

They laughed at the Eagles, the Sixers & process

Now it’s our turn to show them we’re bosses!

But tonight we’re in first, like the rest of the teams

And all we can do is have positive dreams

Can’t wait til tomorrow; dress warm cuz it’s freezing,

“Good Luck Philadelphia, and to the fans a great season.”