You are my density!

Hoodwink’d    by cj hood

You are my density!

THE BULLPEN FELL APART?

I went to the night game last night.  Weak offensive affair, as per usual when we face a sh*tty team, but Lee was definitely on-point.  Howard had a walk off in the 10th and fun was had by all.  I’d share my pics with you, but all I have are 20 close-ups of Pence’s ass via my wife.  Regardless, this Hoodwink’d focuses on what the Phils must do in order to fulfill their density (said in a George McFly lisp).

-Chooch needs to keep on keepin….his bat always gets hot in the playoffs.

-Howard doesn’t need to hit homeruns or even focus on RBI’s…he just needs to make contact.

-Utley needs to ‘not take one for the team and remain healthy.’

-J*Roll needs to stay healthy and avoid swinging at the 1st pitch.

-Polanco…stay healthy and get the bat back you had in the beginning of the season.

-Pence…..keep on truckin….alls good yo!

-Big Daddy Shane needs to get out of his current slump….which I know he will.

-Raaaaaaaauuuuuuuul! Your hot & cold, but it’s ok just to be warm.

-Mayberry needs to be used as often as possible.

-I wouldn’t use Gload as a PH unless I’ve exhausted all of my other options.

-Francisco and Bowker need to stay loose.

-Juan Samuel needs to learn who has wheels and who doesn’t.

-Speaking of Wheels…he needs to go see Morrie Kessler and get an adjustment.

-T*Mac needs a crowbar to get himself out of Sarge’s ass!

-Sarge needs a 2011 Phillies World Series Champs Kangol!

I’M GONNA CHOKE SOMEONE OUT WITH A PHONE CORD IF THE PHILS DON’T STAY HEALTHY!

-Halladay, Lee & Hamels….you got this!!!

-Worley needs to be the 4th starter…let Oswalt handle the stress of being in the bullpen.

-Kendrick needs the State Farms Award for always being there when needed.  He’s going to play a major role coming out of the pen.

-Bastardo needs a good pep talk….like Naughty By Nature sez….”Everything’s Gonna Be Alright”

-You can give Stutes a pep talk as well, but I don’t know how much it will help.

-If Blanton gets an open check from Campos…he as well will be a nice weapon to have in the pen!

-Madson knows what’s up!

-Lidge needs to be given an early off season.

-Overall the offense can’t let the Aces down!

-the Phils need to face the Brewers…that team’s in more disarray than the Kardashians!

-so…..Prince Fielder needs to keep running his mouth and Tony Plush needs to keep looking stupid!

-and cj hood needs to get some sleep….let’s get ’bunted!!!